Back in Business?

>beatbox my heartbeat. untie my shoes like I did my heartstrings
---
Hello world. It's been a while. My life has changed. No, my mind has changed - I just see life much differently now. My life's changed too. I guess.

I'm back into playing WoW, I play TF2 almost religiously now, and I'm only taking 9 credits in school this semester. I haven't been scheduled to work in a week. I like my classes, they are easy. I'm pretty much completely alone all day long, every day. By the time people start coming home, I'm either just starting to go to class, or have had to work. I feel insane. I think I'm starting to dislike other people around me. I'm uncomfortable. I think I'm going to start working out next week after my birthday on the 23rd.

Summer Blues: Part I

>looking for nothing
>dinner bah
---
My fucking life. Shit.

I can't even begin to explain what the hell is wrong with me lately. I have no motivation to do anything. It seems that work is the only fun I have all day, and that's definitely a stretch.

I can't read, I can't bring myself to play WoW, I can't make music, watch movies, eat something, anything. I just have no desire to do any of it. The only problem is what I do have attention for. I just tried drawing while listening to System of a Down. I came up with a face, and a little hair before losing all interest in art in general.

4chan doesn't amuse like it used to, nor does gamefaqs, facebook, myspace, wis.dm, or stumble. No one emails me, the only 2 blogs I read rarely update (kinda like me, heh...), and there are so few people that are entertaining on AIM it's sad.

Anyway, BAWWWWWWWW.

Here I am, now where are the past three weeks?

>drop a heart/break a name
---
So here I am, still off the track of my life. I feel so much slipping away, missed opportunities, jokes, moments, people. I don't know what to do with myself. I'm in a terrible grind right now, merely weeks into my summer break. It's torturous. I need more excitement in my life, but I don't know where to get it from.

Drinking is always a fun escape, but I need new places and faces, I can't do the usual "world explorer" bit I like to do with gas prices this high, and there's also the little fact that I've explored so much stuff with my friends I have left little to be found. I think Toledo was the farthest any of them were willing to go on my adventures, but I know I'd take them out to California if they had the time and I had the money.

I can barely get into WoW. TF2 isn't cutting it lately. CS:S is a love/hate relationship. I keep forgetting that Half Life 2 exists. I don't want to replay Bioshock until I get DX10. Not enough people play Smash Brothers well enough for them to be a challenge or any fun at all. Anything else? Not game related.

Books are hard to read for me now, though this could be just my choice of reading materials. Hitchhiker's Guide is good, but so odd that I often lose focus on what the hell is going on. I keep trying to read my books on philosophy, but with my schedule the way it is I'm usually too tired to stay awake for more than a few paragraphs or have already made plans for a night out. I want to be enlightened though, just at a more convenient time.

So basically, I'm in a rut. A really fucked up rut, and I hate it.

Wow, I guess I need some philosophical studies to get some pleasure out of what I have.

Reach for the Schuyler!

>the definition of fucked
>wurkin
>listening to dre and writing a paper. i am happy
---
So there's this guy at work, the new guy in the kitchen. Well, he's actually been here for almost a month now, but he still acts like a new guy. I digress.

So, he was initially hired because he was a general manager at a Papa Romanos and was stuck working 70 hour weeks, so he wanted out. Everyone had high hopes for him, he's worked in food, he was a general manager, so he might know more than just kitchen duties, and he's used to working long hours, so he'd be good working the shorter shifts we have.

His first week of training, he was alright. Quiet, but alright. We figured he'd be more talkative once he got to know everyone, and would get a lot better at his job once he got used to the swing of things.

Nope. Wrong.

Well, only kind of. He's a bit more talkative now, but still moves like a snail when working. He still messes stuff up more often then he should, and still doesn't understand how to do a lot of stuff that should be self explanatory. One of the problems could be his eyes, or lack of vision. He obviously needs a new prescription because even with his glasses, he spends about 15 seconds squinting at a receipt before he can read it. When food is being rung in ever couple seconds, and stuff is coming out of the oven every other couple seconds, we obviously don't have the time to spend 10 minutes reading a pizza ticket because our eyes don't work.

Okay, yes, I am being very harsh and judgmental on this kid and his physical capabilities, or lack thereof. My points are well founded though, so I don't care. At least he has a personality. Or wait, never mind, he doesn't.

This guy doesn't know how to tell a story, or even a sentence without putting me to sleep. He says words, but they fall flat and go nowhere. Heres some examples (I am the">", he is the "-")
=====
>Man, I cannot wait to get out of class in 2 weeks. Freedom, friends in town, I can go out and drink and party all the time. It'll be a grand 'ole drunken time.
-Oh, you like drinking eh?
>(kinda freaked out at this odd question) Yeah, it's fun, and I love my friends.
-Yeah, the other day me and my friends went out and got some booze.
>Oh yeah?
-Yeah.
>...
-(for some reason, just walks away, off in some random direction)
>...
=====
Seriously? Seriously? That's it? You got booze? What happened? Who got thrown off a third story balcony? Who accidentally slept with their cousin? Who slammed the fifth of vodka in 10 minutes? Something has to have happened. Or it didn't. Maybe he just bought booze, drank it, then went and sat in the corner and cried. I don't know. What I do know is I don't need his mental drool polluting my eardrums.

Also, today, he told me and Scott a story about registering for classes at HFCC. It was excessively lame, but he had one classic line where his information got locked into the registration servers and couldn't be modified or moved. Apparently he was "trapped in cyberspace". We had quite the laugh behind his back, entirely at his expense. It was too good to pass up. Seriously.

Oh, and I know that he was thinking of that line for days. I just know. 3 nights ago, or maybe the next afternoon, he thought of being trapped in cyberspace and said, in his go nowhere, monotone inner monologue "I have to use this one! BALLIN'!". Seriously. I bet he even thought the word "ballin'".