Posts
>oops, wrong button
>woah, hell of a party
---
I think it's funny when my dog yawns or opens her mouth really quick and her tongue flops around.
No tongue control, how weird.
2.18.2009
2.10.2009
On a Mothafuckin' Boat!
>i hate work
>on a mothafuckin boat
---
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7yfISlGLNU
I've watched this video probably 10 times in the past 24 hours. I was surprised that T-Pain would do something like this, but after seeing it, I only like him more.
Off to work...
>on a mothafuckin boat
---
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7yfISlGLNU
I've watched this video probably 10 times in the past 24 hours. I was surprised that T-Pain would do something like this, but after seeing it, I only like him more.
Off to work...
2.07.2009
Feeling Change
>strippers named cinnamon, more chips than pentium HOLY SHIT
>and I've got this crazy feeling
>5 bank accounts, 3 oz., and 2 vehicles
---
Getting into my car the other day, I swear I could smell spring. It wasn't cold outside, just cool. A breeze came along as I was opening my door, and it didn't have a chilly scent to it, but something fresh and alive, not warm yet like the summertime, but distinct from the sterile, bitter scent of winter. It felt good to be able to know that the season will soon be over.
>and I've got this crazy feeling
>5 bank accounts, 3 oz., and 2 vehicles
---
Getting into my car the other day, I swear I could smell spring. It wasn't cold outside, just cool. A breeze came along as I was opening my door, and it didn't have a chilly scent to it, but something fresh and alive, not warm yet like the summertime, but distinct from the sterile, bitter scent of winter. It felt good to be able to know that the season will soon be over.
2.03.2009
Who Knows What's up?
>me and icarus burn together
>i roll with ma shit off safety
---
I have no idea what's been wrong with me the past 3 days. All I want to do is sleep, and I don't even care. I skipped class yesterday and today so I could sleep for an extra 6 hours. Yesterday, I got my paycheck, chilled with some friends for a couple hours, then came home and fell asleep on the couch. I don't even want to be awake right now. I don't feel depressed, just really really tired and a little apathetic.
On a lighter note:
"Just think about it. We'd be a beacon of light for the gay community."
"Oh yeah?"
"Kinda like the gay Martin Luther Kings. Only better!"
"Well, wouldn't we be Martin Luther Queens then?"
>i roll with ma shit off safety
---
I have no idea what's been wrong with me the past 3 days. All I want to do is sleep, and I don't even care. I skipped class yesterday and today so I could sleep for an extra 6 hours. Yesterday, I got my paycheck, chilled with some friends for a couple hours, then came home and fell asleep on the couch. I don't even want to be awake right now. I don't feel depressed, just really really tired and a little apathetic.
On a lighter note:
"Just think about it. We'd be a beacon of light for the gay community."
"Oh yeah?"
"Kinda like the gay Martin Luther Kings. Only better!"
"Well, wouldn't we be Martin Luther Queens then?"
1.23.2009
I'm in bed
>me and icarus burn together
---
So I finally got my laptop, the Asus eee 900HA. I gotta say, besides the really small keyboard, this thing is pretty damn awesome. It's super small so I can easily take this thing everywhere and I'll probably get around to downloading some games for this thing, probably a bunch of emulators. It'll be like a completely portable old school gaming machine. With a couple RPGs and some quick mindless distractions like Columns I think I'll be well entertained wherever I go for quite some time.
Well, I suppose it's time to defragment the drives and whatnot to make sure this thing will run to it's full potential. I can't wait to see what else I can do with this thing.
---
So I finally got my laptop, the Asus eee 900HA. I gotta say, besides the really small keyboard, this thing is pretty damn awesome. It's super small so I can easily take this thing everywhere and I'll probably get around to downloading some games for this thing, probably a bunch of emulators. It'll be like a completely portable old school gaming machine. With a couple RPGs and some quick mindless distractions like Columns I think I'll be well entertained wherever I go for quite some time.
Well, I suppose it's time to defragment the drives and whatnot to make sure this thing will run to it's full potential. I can't wait to see what else I can do with this thing.
1.20.2009
Rick Warren
>interesting speech eh?
---
What the fuck was up with Rick Warren and his nice long prayer? Shit pissed me off. Ugh, I can't even believe they gave him that time on the podium. At the presidential inauguration of all places too. His politics are hateful and inconsiderate of anything other than whatever church faction he pledged himself to. How incredibly stupid and ignorant.
Now, I'm not saying that I don't believe that anyone should be able to speak their mind, cause I'm all about free expression and anti-censorship and whatnot. Really though, I think something needs to be done about big ethical foundations found in religion and whatnot. We need to somehow decide once and for all what is acceptable and what isn't when dealing with all these religious nuts.
Obviously, as any semi-rational child will figure, their whole idea and concept of god is completely false. The religious leaders of the world have been slowly changing their positions and backing up for hundreds of years now. Why is it that a few hundred years ago the Bible was taken as fact, while today much of it is either open for interpretation or considered highly symbolic? Wake the fuck up and realize that none of that shit is true. How can the flawless word of God just magically be reinterpreted and have it's meanings and histories changed based on the current state of human cultural development? Just like some ass backwards textbook of mysticism, it keeps undergoing revisions and new editions, only instead of actually presenting any sort of factual, hard evidence from the time of scripture or even any sort of miracles from today, the meanings just get reassigned to keep people doing whatever it is the church wants.
In all seriousness, we need to have a final, end all decision on the validity of the religions of the world. These billions of foolish people all believe in their one god who will save them while simultaneously thinking, and possibly preaching, how every other of the religions out there are false. Something is seriously wrong with that. It defies all logic.
Yes, I'm a complete atheist. Agnosticism is even worse than being religious because either you believe in a god or not, easy as that. However, I only use these terms in the sense of religious beliefs. That's because even with science as the finest tool for deciphering what's out there in the universe, we still don't have any idea about the cause of everything, or what will happen when it ends. Obviously something happened, and the word "god" is so loaded with so many different meanings at once that it's foolish to use it to describe whatever it was that started whatever our reality is. Besides that, were relatively new on the evolutionary chain as humans. Maybe in 25,000 years some new evolutionary trend will be fully implemented and we'll see everything in a whole new, clearer light.
---
What the fuck was up with Rick Warren and his nice long prayer? Shit pissed me off. Ugh, I can't even believe they gave him that time on the podium. At the presidential inauguration of all places too. His politics are hateful and inconsiderate of anything other than whatever church faction he pledged himself to. How incredibly stupid and ignorant.
Now, I'm not saying that I don't believe that anyone should be able to speak their mind, cause I'm all about free expression and anti-censorship and whatnot. Really though, I think something needs to be done about big ethical foundations found in religion and whatnot. We need to somehow decide once and for all what is acceptable and what isn't when dealing with all these religious nuts.
Obviously, as any semi-rational child will figure, their whole idea and concept of god is completely false. The religious leaders of the world have been slowly changing their positions and backing up for hundreds of years now. Why is it that a few hundred years ago the Bible was taken as fact, while today much of it is either open for interpretation or considered highly symbolic? Wake the fuck up and realize that none of that shit is true. How can the flawless word of God just magically be reinterpreted and have it's meanings and histories changed based on the current state of human cultural development? Just like some ass backwards textbook of mysticism, it keeps undergoing revisions and new editions, only instead of actually presenting any sort of factual, hard evidence from the time of scripture or even any sort of miracles from today, the meanings just get reassigned to keep people doing whatever it is the church wants.
In all seriousness, we need to have a final, end all decision on the validity of the religions of the world. These billions of foolish people all believe in their one god who will save them while simultaneously thinking, and possibly preaching, how every other of the religions out there are false. Something is seriously wrong with that. It defies all logic.
Yes, I'm a complete atheist. Agnosticism is even worse than being religious because either you believe in a god or not, easy as that. However, I only use these terms in the sense of religious beliefs. That's because even with science as the finest tool for deciphering what's out there in the universe, we still don't have any idea about the cause of everything, or what will happen when it ends. Obviously something happened, and the word "god" is so loaded with so many different meanings at once that it's foolish to use it to describe whatever it was that started whatever our reality is. Besides that, were relatively new on the evolutionary chain as humans. Maybe in 25,000 years some new evolutionary trend will be fully implemented and we'll see everything in a whole new, clearer light.
1.19.2009
New. New. New.
>new ppg@8
---
Well, today was a pretty exciting day. I cleaned and completely reorganized my room and closet, started getting my freshly "xp upgraded" computer back in action, got a few new albums for the music collection, and even saw the new Powerpuff Girls episode. It was awesome.
Besides that, I now have Mass Effect and Spore installed and running smoothly. I just got to the land animal phase on Spore, but I know what's in store ahead and I'm anxious to see what kind of awesome stuff I can create. The amount of freedom you have is so great, especially when designing your creature. Buildings should be fun too.
Well, this is getting cut short because the cough syrup just hit me like a truck.
---
Well, today was a pretty exciting day. I cleaned and completely reorganized my room and closet, started getting my freshly "xp upgraded" computer back in action, got a few new albums for the music collection, and even saw the new Powerpuff Girls episode. It was awesome.
Besides that, I now have Mass Effect and Spore installed and running smoothly. I just got to the land animal phase on Spore, but I know what's in store ahead and I'm anxious to see what kind of awesome stuff I can create. The amount of freedom you have is so great, especially when designing your creature. Buildings should be fun too.
Well, this is getting cut short because the cough syrup just hit me like a truck.
1.15.2009
Just Gotta Ignore It...
>tatted up and fatted up
---
As seemingly good as my life has been recently, the world itself is the same old shitty place. I can't get over how fucking much my books cost, and continue to cost me since I don't even own all of them yet. 110$ for a book I know I'll use maybe 5 times over the next 3 months. Not even 5 important times. Bullshit. The schools and book companies are gouging my wallet like no other. Their profits have to be ridiculous.
This past week at school was going pretty well for me. Good classes, nice people, decent teachers, all arranged in a tight fitting, efficient schedule. I have free time in the afternoon and actually do homework the night it's assigned all while having time to burn on my own endeavors.
Today I realized why my week was going so well - I wasn't scheduled for any of those days at work, and really, I didn't even think about that place for a second. I didn't miss it one bit. Now I realize that work is for the most part, the cause of all the stress in my life. Every night of every weekend is spent there, giving me no time to go out and see other people. Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays are busy days, and therefore I do lots of work for long and painful shifts. Yeah, they're maybe only 6 or 7 hours, but when they last from 4pm onward the majority of your day, and the time you could be spending with others, takes place in a miserable little kitchen run by confused, miserable people. After a single shift today, I was sick of that place. I need to get out. How do the managers work 50 hours a week there? How? It's got to be soul crushing.
---
As seemingly good as my life has been recently, the world itself is the same old shitty place. I can't get over how fucking much my books cost, and continue to cost me since I don't even own all of them yet. 110$ for a book I know I'll use maybe 5 times over the next 3 months. Not even 5 important times. Bullshit. The schools and book companies are gouging my wallet like no other. Their profits have to be ridiculous.
This past week at school was going pretty well for me. Good classes, nice people, decent teachers, all arranged in a tight fitting, efficient schedule. I have free time in the afternoon and actually do homework the night it's assigned all while having time to burn on my own endeavors.
Today I realized why my week was going so well - I wasn't scheduled for any of those days at work, and really, I didn't even think about that place for a second. I didn't miss it one bit. Now I realize that work is for the most part, the cause of all the stress in my life. Every night of every weekend is spent there, giving me no time to go out and see other people. Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays are busy days, and therefore I do lots of work for long and painful shifts. Yeah, they're maybe only 6 or 7 hours, but when they last from 4pm onward the majority of your day, and the time you could be spending with others, takes place in a miserable little kitchen run by confused, miserable people. After a single shift today, I was sick of that place. I need to get out. How do the managers work 50 hours a week there? How? It's got to be soul crushing.
1.11.2009
Walkie Talkie
>that beautiful, intoxicating yellow house. and that horrendous landscaping next door...
---
Yesterday, on the last full night of my little winter vacation I can honestly say that I had the most interesting, exciting, exhausting time in who knows how long. Everything I did was fun, memorable even. Imagine that.
I got off work, bundled up, and Neal and I trekked through the snow and fracturing ice to go see the fort for the first time in months.
I think that only a picture can do this any sort of justice. The woods were dead and bare, but so bright with moonlight. Besides a few unidentifiable animal tracks, we were the only signs of life. It felt good to seem like the only humans on earth. I felt total disconnect from all the shit I have to see, hear, smell, think about, and deal with in my day to day affairs. Everything just melted into the snow and got left behind.
Afterwards, we met up with one of Neal's friends and her sister and wandered the neighborhood for at least an hour, just walking in the middle of the snow filled streets. It was cold, I was congested, but it was a long and good conversation with some good people.
I could have gone to bed happy, but then I got a call from Andy, my coworker, and he wanted to go sledding at Ford Field. I decided to meet up with them, even though it was already well past midnight and my legs were sore.
I ended up waiting 25 minutes at the park for them to get there, all while trying to get there as fast as possible because I figured they'd be waiting for me. I wasn't mad though, I wasn't even that annoyed, and when everyone showed up we had a blast sledding until around 2:30. Good times.
Tomorrow is my first day of classes for the new semester. I don't want to go at all. Should I?
---
Yesterday, on the last full night of my little winter vacation I can honestly say that I had the most interesting, exciting, exhausting time in who knows how long. Everything I did was fun, memorable even. Imagine that.
I got off work, bundled up, and Neal and I trekked through the snow and fracturing ice to go see the fort for the first time in months.
I think that only a picture can do this any sort of justice. The woods were dead and bare, but so bright with moonlight. Besides a few unidentifiable animal tracks, we were the only signs of life. It felt good to seem like the only humans on earth. I felt total disconnect from all the shit I have to see, hear, smell, think about, and deal with in my day to day affairs. Everything just melted into the snow and got left behind.Afterwards, we met up with one of Neal's friends and her sister and wandered the neighborhood for at least an hour, just walking in the middle of the snow filled streets. It was cold, I was congested, but it was a long and good conversation with some good people.
I could have gone to bed happy, but then I got a call from Andy, my coworker, and he wanted to go sledding at Ford Field. I decided to meet up with them, even though it was already well past midnight and my legs were sore.
I ended up waiting 25 minutes at the park for them to get there, all while trying to get there as fast as possible because I figured they'd be waiting for me. I wasn't mad though, I wasn't even that annoyed, and when everyone showed up we had a blast sledding until around 2:30. Good times.
Tomorrow is my first day of classes for the new semester. I don't want to go at all. Should I?
1.09.2009
Immune
glasses glasses!
---
So, on my quest to try to stop wasting time getting messed up I decided to try to take out what was left of the new years beers tonight. I just drank 10 beers, and I really don't even feel that large of a buzz. Granted, they were Busch Light - but still. I just took a 20 minute walk and I didn't feel tipsy or clumsy or much of anything.
Besides the 120 oz. of beer, I had a pretty awesome night. Neal and Aaron came over and we just talked for 3 hours straight. We talked about abortion, human nature, life, feelings, society, 2012, and total social transparency. It was filled with debate, opinion, and argument. It was both nerve wracking and relaxing. It was probably the best Friday night I've had in a long while.
Here's to more nights like this one. Cheers.
---
So, on my quest to try to stop wasting time getting messed up I decided to try to take out what was left of the new years beers tonight. I just drank 10 beers, and I really don't even feel that large of a buzz. Granted, they were Busch Light - but still. I just took a 20 minute walk and I didn't feel tipsy or clumsy or much of anything.
Besides the 120 oz. of beer, I had a pretty awesome night. Neal and Aaron came over and we just talked for 3 hours straight. We talked about abortion, human nature, life, feelings, society, 2012, and total social transparency. It was filled with debate, opinion, and argument. It was both nerve wracking and relaxing. It was probably the best Friday night I've had in a long while.
Here's to more nights like this one. Cheers.
1.04.2009
Who Knew the New Me?
>I want to publicly denounce somebody.
---
New Years resolutions: Work out, stop all the sugar intake, work hard, don't waste time or money.
Working out hasn't been all that hard. Maybe I'm not doing it right, or maybe I'm underestimating myself. Maybe it's just easy for me. Maybe anything is easy for me. Anything. That would be great. Phenomenal. I think it's worth looking into.
As part of my full self redo, I'm also done with smoking for a few months. It's an investment that takes time and money,two things that most of human life revolves around almost exclusively, and two things I always seem to not have enough of. The last of the ganj will be gone either tonight or tomorrow. After that, no restock, no calls, no matching, no free hits. Picard, the hookah is getting washed and scrubbed tomorrow, Tassadar is getting soaked in hot water and soap as I write this. I have a single zig zag left, but not enough to fill it. That goes in the trash I guess.
I just washed my bathroom clean of anything left behind. Ashes, trash I discarded, crap on the windowsil. I'll mop and vacuum tomorrow since I don't have work.
My room is already messy from the New Year's eve party. Clothes and water bottles are discarded all over the floor. There are bits of trash I either missed or keep ignoring on the floor. Nothing major, nothing disgusting, but it's not clean. I want to reorganize my room too. We shall see.
---
New Years resolutions: Work out, stop all the sugar intake, work hard, don't waste time or money.
Working out hasn't been all that hard. Maybe I'm not doing it right, or maybe I'm underestimating myself. Maybe it's just easy for me. Maybe anything is easy for me. Anything. That would be great. Phenomenal. I think it's worth looking into.
As part of my full self redo, I'm also done with smoking for a few months. It's an investment that takes time and money,two things that most of human life revolves around almost exclusively, and two things I always seem to not have enough of. The last of the ganj will be gone either tonight or tomorrow. After that, no restock, no calls, no matching, no free hits. Picard, the hookah is getting washed and scrubbed tomorrow, Tassadar is getting soaked in hot water and soap as I write this. I have a single zig zag left, but not enough to fill it. That goes in the trash I guess.
I just washed my bathroom clean of anything left behind. Ashes, trash I discarded, crap on the windowsil. I'll mop and vacuum tomorrow since I don't have work.
My room is already messy from the New Year's eve party. Clothes and water bottles are discarded all over the floor. There are bits of trash I either missed or keep ignoring on the floor. Nothing major, nothing disgusting, but it's not clean. I want to reorganize my room too. We shall see.
12.26.2008
An Anecdotal Adventure
>L4D
---
A little anecdote: A few weekends ago I had the flu. Bad. Worse than ever. I was, for about 3 hours, puking up yellow stomach acid and water because my stomach was that empty. Really unpleasant, especially when coupled with the shits. This lasted all night, and in the morning I decided to take a super long hot shower. I ran it until the full blast hot water ran cold. There was no more warm water left in our entire house, or our neighbors house I would guess.
Anyway, what the fuck is up with sharting? That's terrible. You go to sneeze, cough, fart, or whatever and a little liquid shit pops out to say "hi" allover your ass cheeks and inside of your shorts. I think everyone's reaction is the same when this happens too. You don't go "Wait. Hm. What was it that just happened? I'm not quite sure - I need to investigate.". You know what just happened. There's nothing else it could be. You, a full grown adult, just shit yourself while laying on the nice couch. Why couldn't it have been the loveseat? When this happens, you go "Fuck.", realize the "being a full grown adult" thing, and then say "Nobody must ever know of this! I need to get this out of here fast!" and proceed do everything in their power to erase any evidence of the event happening.
Well, the clothes get cleaned up really good, wiped clean with toilet paper and drenched in a half bottle of laundry pre-wash stain remover. You check your surroundings. Maybe something else got shit on it somehow? It's likely that there isn't. Why are you inspecting all the lamp shades? "Didn't I adjust the lamp a few minutes ago?" you think in panic. "Was it before or after this incident." then "Or was it this one? The nice navy blue on from IKEA".
The obligatory shower is just as bad. How do you get it off the fastest? Let the hot water run down it? That'll take forever, and it gets allover your legs and feet. Your feet are bad enough without a nice layer of shit on them. You don't want to use your hands either, this situation is gross enough already. Poop hands should probably be avoided.
The shower part is a lot worse when you have to do it with cold water, like when you take a 30 minute hot shower earlier in the day and use it all up.
Eventually, something will happen that leads to cleanliness. I don't how to explain it without watching every episode of MacGyver because out of a seriously limited number of cleaning supplies and tools everything will get taken care of through some ingenious manipulation.
---
A little anecdote: A few weekends ago I had the flu. Bad. Worse than ever. I was, for about 3 hours, puking up yellow stomach acid and water because my stomach was that empty. Really unpleasant, especially when coupled with the shits. This lasted all night, and in the morning I decided to take a super long hot shower. I ran it until the full blast hot water ran cold. There was no more warm water left in our entire house, or our neighbors house I would guess.
Anyway, what the fuck is up with sharting? That's terrible. You go to sneeze, cough, fart, or whatever and a little liquid shit pops out to say "hi" allover your ass cheeks and inside of your shorts. I think everyone's reaction is the same when this happens too. You don't go "Wait. Hm. What was it that just happened? I'm not quite sure - I need to investigate.". You know what just happened. There's nothing else it could be. You, a full grown adult, just shit yourself while laying on the nice couch. Why couldn't it have been the loveseat? When this happens, you go "Fuck.", realize the "being a full grown adult" thing, and then say "Nobody must ever know of this! I need to get this out of here fast!" and proceed do everything in their power to erase any evidence of the event happening.
Well, the clothes get cleaned up really good, wiped clean with toilet paper and drenched in a half bottle of laundry pre-wash stain remover. You check your surroundings. Maybe something else got shit on it somehow? It's likely that there isn't. Why are you inspecting all the lamp shades? "Didn't I adjust the lamp a few minutes ago?" you think in panic. "Was it before or after this incident." then "Or was it this one? The nice navy blue on from IKEA".
The obligatory shower is just as bad. How do you get it off the fastest? Let the hot water run down it? That'll take forever, and it gets allover your legs and feet. Your feet are bad enough without a nice layer of shit on them. You don't want to use your hands either, this situation is gross enough already. Poop hands should probably be avoided.
The shower part is a lot worse when you have to do it with cold water, like when you take a 30 minute hot shower earlier in the day and use it all up.
Eventually, something will happen that leads to cleanliness. I don't how to explain it without watching every episode of MacGyver because out of a seriously limited number of cleaning supplies and tools everything will get taken care of through some ingenious manipulation.
12.25.2008
12.25.2008
>VOGUE< --- It's finally Christmas. I never thought this year would come to a close this soon. I also never thought that holiday shopping could be such a pain in the ass. I always do all my shopping online, and now after doing the whole thing the "normal" way, I don't see why anyone would ever go to a store except for food. Lines, people, parking spots, dealing with cash, looking for stuff without the help of a search bar. What a headache. I bought and received some pretty awesome gifts this year. For my brothers, I got Adam a Boo pillow from Mario which I know is totally kickass and a Jack Skellington figure. Randy got a Japanese Mega Blok model of Palkia from Pokemon Pearl which is probably the coolest thing I've ever bought for anybody. Nathan got a Japanese Lucario action figure and some Bleach character trinkets I figured he could use for his snowboarding gear. My mom got baking sheets. Not badass or anything, but she wanted them, so that was successful. My dad got some thermal jeans from the army surplus store, and my aunt got an Amy Winehouse CD. She'd been asking me to burn her a CD of her music for about a month now, but I don't have any, so I figured an album would be perfect.
As for me, I think I hit the jackpot this year. I feel almost guilt ridden for all the awesome shit I got. Season 1 of Dexter which I've been dying to watch, a Quaran, Left 4 Dead on PC which was also really anticipated, Boom Blox for Wii, Madonna's Immaculate Collection, Panic at the Disco's Live in Chicago album which I didn't even know existed, Spore, a printer/scanner, some weights, a couple hundred dollars in gift cards and cash, and a new wallet.
I'm really excited to get the scanner hooked up sometime today or tomorrow. I have a couple hundred pages of sketches I've done over the years and scattered around the house, and now I can make 'em digital. I think I'll even take the time to ink and color some of them digitally and see how nice I can make some of my stuff look. I bet half of my stuff will look like complete shit if I go through and look at it now, but whatever. It's artwork, my artwork, and I didn't make it so I could throw it away. Now, hopefully this will lead to me working on my biggest dream project of all - a "graphic novel" (wtf how pretentious) or some short flash cartoons. I know how to animate alright, I just need a way to not have to draw everything by mouse and the scanner should help me.
Well, I'm out of mimosa, and I think I need more to keep the holiday buzz going. We couldn't do this sober now could we?
As for me, I think I hit the jackpot this year. I feel almost guilt ridden for all the awesome shit I got. Season 1 of Dexter which I've been dying to watch, a Quaran, Left 4 Dead on PC which was also really anticipated, Boom Blox for Wii, Madonna's Immaculate Collection, Panic at the Disco's Live in Chicago album which I didn't even know existed, Spore, a printer/scanner, some weights, a couple hundred dollars in gift cards and cash, and a new wallet.
I'm really excited to get the scanner hooked up sometime today or tomorrow. I have a couple hundred pages of sketches I've done over the years and scattered around the house, and now I can make 'em digital. I think I'll even take the time to ink and color some of them digitally and see how nice I can make some of my stuff look. I bet half of my stuff will look like complete shit if I go through and look at it now, but whatever. It's artwork, my artwork, and I didn't make it so I could throw it away. Now, hopefully this will lead to me working on my biggest dream project of all - a "graphic novel" (wtf how pretentious) or some short flash cartoons. I know how to animate alright, I just need a way to not have to draw everything by mouse and the scanner should help me.
Well, I'm out of mimosa, and I think I need more to keep the holiday buzz going. We couldn't do this sober now could we?
12.17.2008
I Was Molested at Lunch
>kinda shitty
---
The only choices for lunch in my house today were ramen noodles, instant ramen noodles, and Appian Way pizza with no cheese, just sauce and dough.
I had about 3 clean dishes in the cupboard consisting of a large plastic plate, a FOX 2 NEWS mug, and a ludicrously small cereal bowl. Oh, and I had a single fork sitting in the drawer. No other silverware.
Cringing from my drastically narrowed choices of cuisine, I went for the ever popular and flavorful INSTANT RAMEN affectionately named "Mr. Noodle" which oddly enough sounds like a pet name for a child molester. It was labeled "vegetable flavored" and by the small foil packet of freeze dried peas, microscopic carrot pieces, and corn kernels I suppose this is what was being referred to as the vegetables.
There were sufficient amounts of noodle, but the broth was bitter like most vegetable broth is. The recessitated vegetables were passable, but they all smelled like onion. So did the broth I guess. So does my breath.
To top it all off, it all came packeged in nature friendly styrofoam and shrinkwrap. I'm offended at this poor attempt at food. Too bad it makes up a large portion of my diet.
---
The only choices for lunch in my house today were ramen noodles, instant ramen noodles, and Appian Way pizza with no cheese, just sauce and dough.
I had about 3 clean dishes in the cupboard consisting of a large plastic plate, a FOX 2 NEWS mug, and a ludicrously small cereal bowl. Oh, and I had a single fork sitting in the drawer. No other silverware.
Cringing from my drastically narrowed choices of cuisine, I went for the ever popular and flavorful INSTANT RAMEN affectionately named "Mr. Noodle" which oddly enough sounds like a pet name for a child molester. It was labeled "vegetable flavored" and by the small foil packet of freeze dried peas, microscopic carrot pieces, and corn kernels I suppose this is what was being referred to as the vegetables.
There were sufficient amounts of noodle, but the broth was bitter like most vegetable broth is. The recessitated vegetables were passable, but they all smelled like onion. So did the broth I guess. So does my breath.
To top it all off, it all came packeged in nature friendly styrofoam and shrinkwrap. I'm offended at this poor attempt at food. Too bad it makes up a large portion of my diet.
10.27.2008
Olympic Ping Pong
>(cell phone)
---
It's on odd though to think that my father will be 45 soon. I'll be there one day. It's so far away, but I can see it coming quick. Hell, I just realized that the past 15 months have been a blur, and I'll be 20 in just under a year. Twenty years old and I still feel like a fucking child.
I need to get out of my nest here in scenic Dearborn and do something new. I need to move out of here; move to a distant college town where people are my age and I won't be so cutoff from everything. All my old friends moved out of town to their respective schools, and I know they love it. Why didn't I do it from the start? I can feel them slipping away too. Even the friends I hung with last year don't talk to me anymore. They don't call or text me. They never see me at school. They just went their seperate ways, even though they live right here, so close and still so distant.
I don't care for LCD Soundsystem. They are intensely boring.
Back to dissecting my ever more apparent sense of mortality, I am baffled by the though of the people I know actually dying. One day, they will simply cease to be who they are. No more thoughts, emotions, movements, words. Just their body. The minds' hardware. Everything that really made them who they were, a human being, will be lost forever. Then, the body dissolves and thats that. It's all so futile.
I seem to have nothing optimistic to say.
No, actually I do.
Fall is beautiful. This really is my favorite time of the year by far. The wheather, leaves, crisp air, holidays. It's awesome. I think I do more now. I love the outdoors, I take my dog for walks in the woods, sit on the porch and talk with my friends, and leave the windows in my room cracked just so that the air is chill and my soft, warm bed is all the more inviting.
That reminds me, I have a heated blanket sitting in my closet. It's a real pain in the ass sometimes, but I still use it daily during the winter. It's got two different temperature controllers so that each side of the bed can be individually heated, but all that leads to is a rats nest of tangled electrical cords.
It's got a little feature that makes it so that after 8 hours of use it auto shuts off and "locks" itself so that you can't overuse it until it bursts into flames. Well, that's what it's supposed to do. I'm not quite sure what happened to the sensor, but at random times the thing will go into lockdown mode. Or if I'm especially lucky, only half of the blanket will work thanks to two different controls reading two different sensors. My right shoulder and thigh are sweating, yet my torso and left half of my body seem to be frostbitten. Splendid. I've only used this thing for 3 months, last winter when it was brand new, so I like to think that this is by no means my fault.
---
It's on odd though to think that my father will be 45 soon. I'll be there one day. It's so far away, but I can see it coming quick. Hell, I just realized that the past 15 months have been a blur, and I'll be 20 in just under a year. Twenty years old and I still feel like a fucking child.
I need to get out of my nest here in scenic Dearborn and do something new. I need to move out of here; move to a distant college town where people are my age and I won't be so cutoff from everything. All my old friends moved out of town to their respective schools, and I know they love it. Why didn't I do it from the start? I can feel them slipping away too. Even the friends I hung with last year don't talk to me anymore. They don't call or text me. They never see me at school. They just went their seperate ways, even though they live right here, so close and still so distant.
I don't care for LCD Soundsystem. They are intensely boring.
Back to dissecting my ever more apparent sense of mortality, I am baffled by the though of the people I know actually dying. One day, they will simply cease to be who they are. No more thoughts, emotions, movements, words. Just their body. The minds' hardware. Everything that really made them who they were, a human being, will be lost forever. Then, the body dissolves and thats that. It's all so futile.
I seem to have nothing optimistic to say.
No, actually I do.
Fall is beautiful. This really is my favorite time of the year by far. The wheather, leaves, crisp air, holidays. It's awesome. I think I do more now. I love the outdoors, I take my dog for walks in the woods, sit on the porch and talk with my friends, and leave the windows in my room cracked just so that the air is chill and my soft, warm bed is all the more inviting.
That reminds me, I have a heated blanket sitting in my closet. It's a real pain in the ass sometimes, but I still use it daily during the winter. It's got two different temperature controllers so that each side of the bed can be individually heated, but all that leads to is a rats nest of tangled electrical cords.
It's got a little feature that makes it so that after 8 hours of use it auto shuts off and "locks" itself so that you can't overuse it until it bursts into flames. Well, that's what it's supposed to do. I'm not quite sure what happened to the sensor, but at random times the thing will go into lockdown mode. Or if I'm especially lucky, only half of the blanket will work thanks to two different controls reading two different sensors. My right shoulder and thigh are sweating, yet my torso and left half of my body seem to be frostbitten. Splendid. I've only used this thing for 3 months, last winter when it was brand new, so I like to think that this is by no means my fault.
9.18.2008
Back in Business?
>beatbox my heartbeat. untie my shoes like I did my heartstrings
---
Hello world. It's been a while. My life has changed. No, my mind has changed - I just see life much differently now. My life's changed too. I guess.
I'm back into playing WoW, I play TF2 almost religiously now, and I'm only taking 9 credits in school this semester. I haven't been scheduled to work in a week. I like my classes, they are easy. I'm pretty much completely alone all day long, every day. By the time people start coming home, I'm either just starting to go to class, or have had to work. I feel insane. I think I'm starting to dislike other people around me. I'm uncomfortable. I think I'm going to start working out next week after my birthday on the 23rd.
---
Hello world. It's been a while. My life has changed. No, my mind has changed - I just see life much differently now. My life's changed too. I guess.
I'm back into playing WoW, I play TF2 almost religiously now, and I'm only taking 9 credits in school this semester. I haven't been scheduled to work in a week. I like my classes, they are easy. I'm pretty much completely alone all day long, every day. By the time people start coming home, I'm either just starting to go to class, or have had to work. I feel insane. I think I'm starting to dislike other people around me. I'm uncomfortable. I think I'm going to start working out next week after my birthday on the 23rd.
8.27.2008
Exile
>Bambino...
---
Well, it's just days before school starts. I feel like hell. I feel useless, dumb, blind, unwanted. I feel I need some sort of break to make myself better. Get rid of this sickness called reality. I guess I contracted it through an epiphany. My sluggish reactions to what life has thrown at me has caused everything I deluded myself into loving to come crashing down on me. I can't comprehend how to decide what it all means, so finding the meaning of the answer is impossible.
I need some sort of escape from my body and earth. From the universe. From suddenly realizing that everything that will ever happen and has ever happened means nothing in the grand scheme of everything or anything.
How do I lift curses?
---
Well, it's just days before school starts. I feel like hell. I feel useless, dumb, blind, unwanted. I feel I need some sort of break to make myself better. Get rid of this sickness called reality. I guess I contracted it through an epiphany. My sluggish reactions to what life has thrown at me has caused everything I deluded myself into loving to come crashing down on me. I can't comprehend how to decide what it all means, so finding the meaning of the answer is impossible.
I need some sort of escape from my body and earth. From the universe. From suddenly realizing that everything that will ever happen and has ever happened means nothing in the grand scheme of everything or anything.
How do I lift curses?
8.25.2008
Clarity
>someone is calling my name from the back of the restaurant
---
Lately, I've been having lengthy periods of a sort of nihilistic clarity. My mind just focuses on the larger picture of everything that goes on around me and it makes a sort of sense out of the world and universe. I swear that within the past few days I have learned the reason why everyone acts the way they do, how the universe works, and how it began and will end. It's bizarre, and scary, and unsettling.
---
Lately, I've been having lengthy periods of a sort of nihilistic clarity. My mind just focuses on the larger picture of everything that goes on around me and it makes a sort of sense out of the world and universe. I swear that within the past few days I have learned the reason why everyone acts the way they do, how the universe works, and how it began and will end. It's bizarre, and scary, and unsettling.
7.25.2008
Boggled...
>hey baby i hear the blues a callin'
>tossed salad and scrambled eggs
---
I don't even know what to say right now, my life is a mess. A horrible, horrible mess. Shit is fucked up. I'm not even sure where to begin the reconstruction. Relationships? Work? School? Home? Myself?
One thing I do know is that I'm on nasaimages.org. I'm fucking blown away. Maybe it's because I haven't been drunk in a while and I forgot the awesome feeling, but just looking at these photographs of hundreds of galaxies each with billions of stars, I can't help but want to simultaneously kill myself out of fear of uselessness and celebrate at the beautiful chaos of the universe. I'm fucking torn between the two. I've never felt so powerful and so weak at the same time. The mere fact that all of this exists is so excruciatingly wonderful and terrifying at the same time is almost like ecstasy.
>tossed salad and scrambled eggs
---
I don't even know what to say right now, my life is a mess. A horrible, horrible mess. Shit is fucked up. I'm not even sure where to begin the reconstruction. Relationships? Work? School? Home? Myself?
One thing I do know is that I'm on nasaimages.org. I'm fucking blown away. Maybe it's because I haven't been drunk in a while and I forgot the awesome feeling, but just looking at these photographs of hundreds of galaxies each with billions of stars, I can't help but want to simultaneously kill myself out of fear of uselessness and celebrate at the beautiful chaos of the universe. I'm fucking torn between the two. I've never felt so powerful and so weak at the same time. The mere fact that all of this exists is so excruciatingly wonderful and terrifying at the same time is almost like ecstasy.
6.24.2008
Summer Blues: Part I
>looking for nothing
>dinner bah
---
My fucking life. Shit.
I can't even begin to explain what the hell is wrong with me lately. I have no motivation to do anything. It seems that work is the only fun I have all day, and that's definitely a stretch.
I can't read, I can't bring myself to play WoW, I can't make music, watch movies, eat something, anything. I just have no desire to do any of it. The only problem is what I do have attention for. I just tried drawing while listening to System of a Down. I came up with a face, and a little hair before losing all interest in art in general.
4chan doesn't amuse like it used to, nor does gamefaqs, facebook, myspace, wis.dm, or stumble. No one emails me, the only 2 blogs I read rarely update (kinda like me, heh...), and there are so few people that are entertaining on AIM it's sad.
Anyway, BAWWWWWWWW.
>dinner bah
---
My fucking life. Shit.
I can't even begin to explain what the hell is wrong with me lately. I have no motivation to do anything. It seems that work is the only fun I have all day, and that's definitely a stretch.
I can't read, I can't bring myself to play WoW, I can't make music, watch movies, eat something, anything. I just have no desire to do any of it. The only problem is what I do have attention for. I just tried drawing while listening to System of a Down. I came up with a face, and a little hair before losing all interest in art in general.
4chan doesn't amuse like it used to, nor does gamefaqs, facebook, myspace, wis.dm, or stumble. No one emails me, the only 2 blogs I read rarely update (kinda like me, heh...), and there are so few people that are entertaining on AIM it's sad.
Anyway, BAWWWWWWWW.
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